Truth, belonging, and the softening that followed

Welcome to WMD! I am a writer living in Toronto, Canada and in 2018 I “came out of the fog” as they say in the adoptee world, and realized that being a step adoptee had shaped my identity in a huge and ineffable way. I say “ineffable” because it’s hard to articulate how learning about one’s origins changes a person in the here and now. I’ve written a lot about this (click on About for more on my story and writing) and I think this ineffability is what drives me to seek out others’ experiences of not knowing their genetic father. I’m interested in talking with anyone who has discovered information about a previously unknown parent (or even met them!) as an adult. I’m especially interested in providing a safe space for other step adoptees. I believe sharing our stories fosters compassion and understanding and makes each of us feel less alone.

Hey everybody! It’s a new month and time to meet my newest “Who’s My Daddy? guest. I am so thrilled to be speaking today with Maddie Lock. I read an essay of Maddie’s in 2020 on the Brevity Blog, and I was so excited to encounter another step adoptee writing about her search for her origin story. I reached out to Maddie, and we’ve been in touch ever since. Her memoir Illegitimate was published by Vine Leaves Press in March 2026, and it’s fabulous. I’m really looking forward to talking with Maddie about identity, cross-continental family connections, and truth-telling. Illegitimate is not only a riveting personal story; it also contains a lot of history that, despite my familiarity with the World War II period, was completely new to me. I’m grateful to have read this book and to Maddie for coming on to Who’s My Daddy to speak with me.

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